Just Keep Swimming
Snow Blindness
posted Sunday, 23 January 2005
"Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?" the three girls chanted in unison. Dressed in their coats and hats, they were rosy-cheeked cherubs hard to ignore. We were in the breezeway of the Acme, peddling our wares between the double doors during the snowstorm. The older gentleman, distinguished in his expensively tailored woolen overcoat, smiled. "How much?" he asked the girls. "3.50 a box." "He pulled out $21, and the girls were excited. "Now, I only want five boxes--you girls keep the sixth." "We'll donate it to the USO," my Emily said. My heart glowed. The older man asked about the program, and the other moms looked at me. I piped up, "Through Operation Taste of Home, Girl Scouts ships cookies to troops overseas. You buy a box, and Girl Scouts takes care of the rest." He handed the girls the boxes of cookies, "Here, take them all."
He stopped to speak with me. "I just returned from the Bush Inauguration, and the security was incredible." I smiled, keeping my liberal politics in check. He did just buy cookies for the troops, after all. "Was it lovely?" I asked. "Yes, it was amazing. Although, I must tell you, it's refreshing to be home to see an honest woman's smile. You can light up a room, even bundled up." I laughed and shook my head, "Nah, you're just snow blinded." He smiled, "Witty too? They would love you in DC." I laughed, and he said good bye. 'I hope to see you again." "I'll be here selling cookies." "I'll be back to buy them."
I've never had a hard time attracting older men. The fact is, even when a young woman, I secretly (OK, not so secretly) preferred them. I liked Dan Rather in high school while the girls swooned over Rick Springfield. While the girls on the Collegian fussed over a young writer-in-residence, I preferred the sexiness and sardonic wit of my middle-aged history professor. He was arrogant, bright, and confident. He was a damned good writer who expected a lot from me and my work. I willingly gave it. He was also an athlete, often playing squash with the college boys. Of course he was married. I was jealous and wanted one just like him. I still do.. A lot of older men seem to be very intelligent, and that attracts me, as I like the whole professor-student dynamic.
I read in a book that the most successful marriages are between people who are ten IQ points apart. The author of the study argued that true stimulating conversation comes from intellectual equals. Although physical attraction is initially important, the author argued that intellectual compatibility truly cements a relationship. Evidently, when beauty fades and the kids are raised, you've have beaucoup time to talk. Yeah, well, I know plenty of smart guys who prefer the bubbly, clueless type to the smart, outspoken ones. Stumper is a prime example; he'll talk to me because he needs my "emotional maturity," but he prefers the pretty admin to go out with because she's eye candy. It's been my experience that guys keep smart ones like me for friends, but they honestly prefer the female company of beautiful women. Even in grad school many guys preferred the less intelligent graduate school girls, so I think the author's study is flawed.
Now The Swan from my former company had both characteristics--beauty and brains, so I could never fault the guys for liking her. I like her, too. It's just jealousy on my part: handsome husband, expensive clothes, fancy diamonds, and a ballet dancer in her spare time. The guys at work loved her, even if she was snobby and cold. I wouldn't have minded some of her spill-over attention.
Older men buy me drinks at bars, most only wanting a few minutes of conversation. In stores they stop and say hello to me and Emily, and my hand often gets patted at Church. I remind them of old times, I think--a simpler time when kindness was commonplace. Evidently I exude kindness, but it's not a pheromone to which the guys in my age range respond. Older men seem to be the only ones willing to lavish some attention on me. They see something in me that guys my age don't care to notice. I don't so easily manifest glamour and sophistication. I'm not aloof enough to be a challenge. I'm pigeon-common.
What I need is a few guys in my age range to be permanently snow blinded--then my dun feathers would appear sparkling white like those belonging to a swan.
Speaking of feathers, GO EAGLES!
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